Children deserve to feel loved. They need unconditional love for who they are as they are. If you have a problem with your child’s sexual orientation the problem is in your own mind and not in your child. There are both positives and negatives to being gay, having a gay child or both. The reality of having a gay child can be unsettling for some parents. When parents react to a child’s sexual preference the child feels rejected as a person. A parents rejection leads a child into someone else’s arms. If you have a child who is gay there is no problem. Your reaction is the only problem. An exercise that can help take the charge off is to simply take a piece of paper and draw a line down the middle. Write out all of the negative, difficult things about having a gay child. Next to each negative write out what you are learning and how it helps you grow to be in this situation. Next write a list of all of the positive aspects to having a gay child. As long as you focus on the negative and ignore the positive aspects of the reality of having a gay child you will continue to be emotionally reactive and confuse your child. Consciously listing the positive and negative aspects of any person or situation brings a balanced mind which eventually opens the heart. Unless the mind and heart are aligned emotions will run your life. The heart won’t open unless the mind is balanced. There are both positive as well as negative aspects to every situation. Listing the negatives can be freeing and help to dissolve feelings of frustration. Listing the positives is extremely useful and can be very enlightening. Until you have taken the time to see both the good and bad in your child you will hold back your love. Holding back your love is a way to get your child to turn towards others and away from you. Challenges and adjustments are part of life. Children help us grow and learn in ways that we could never have predicted before they were born. When we love our children unconditionally they can feel it and it’s the number one thing all children need. Love comes from the inside out, there is nothing your child needs to change or fix in order for you to love them as they are. Love is not easy, but its worth it. Listing the negatives and positives is the simplest but most effective way to get balanced. You deserve to have fun and love your child exactly as they are. When you stop being overly consumed with your own emotions you will be in the best position to understand and guide your child so they will grow up with clear examples of how to love themselves and others. See your child in a balanced way and love will flow like a mighty river between you.